While it may be the most difficult step, admitting you struggle with drugs or alcohol is the first step toward recovery. Telling friends, loved ones or colleagues that you have a problem does not have to be shameful. It does not mean you’ve lost control. On the contrary, it shows you are working toward controlling your life. When you ask for help, you can find the support you need. Here are the steps to take:
Find support. In some cases, people will be welcoming when you admit your addiction. However, if you don’t think your friends or immediate family will support you, find one person who will more likely understand. This may be a distant relative, a neighbor or a co-worker. Students may approach a school counselor, while someone working may talk to Human Resources or an EAP contact.
Be honest. Addiction can also bring lying, deception, missed deadlines and more. This is the time to step up and state the truth. Saying something as simple as “I need to talk. I have a problem.” is a great conversation starter. If you’re confused about whether your substance use is an addiction, tell your friends and family that too. Just be clear about your feelings and experiences so that they may understand.
Take responsibility. Do not place the blame on anyone. Starting the conversation will be difficult, but you must own up to your actions. If you are serious about changing, you must be comfortable enough to admit your responsibility. Recognize that your family or friends may have been aware of your alcohol or substance use and were unsure how to approach you about it. Do not hold them accountable for being dismissive.
Express a request for help. You may or may not know what assistance is available. Tell your friends or loved ones about options you may be considering or that you need help finding options such as an addiction treatment center, therapist or a 12-step group.
Explain why you are seeking help. Tell your friends or loved ones why you made this decision. State why this is the time for you to get help and what you hope your future will look like. Ask them to support you as you move forward.
Prepare for resistance. Sometimes, substance use can affect those around you. Those you care about may not believe you want to get help or might be angry or defensive. You may want to write things on paper and have information or goals. Be prepared for their reactions and be sure to listen, understand and acknowledge their feelings.
Once you make your feelings known, you can start on a journey to recovery. Be sure to access the many resources available to help you understand addiction and the recovery process.
